Ladies and Gentlemen, as a warning this blog post may will contain adult subject matter unsuitable for those under 18 (but over 75). And it may also contain subject matter that may creep you out, gross you out, make you chuckle, or make you run to your local grocery store. It may also make you consult your: local teenager, pastor, best friend, waxer, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, soul mate, sole mate, and/or dog.
Today’s Thankful Thursday has to do with… hair removal.
OK people, this may come as a shock to some of you but people now a days are… how shall I put this? Um. Well. Gee. Uh.
You know. Down There?
I myself, like to be properly groomed and it is very important during the summer months when we spend a lot of time in bathing suits. You know, for tri’s and swimming. And running in those super short shorts. Oh and washing the car in your bikini.
Now that you know about my quest for a hair-free/bump-free bikini line (TMI? See, I warned you!) I might as well tell you what I am thankful for today. Here it is:
Please note that it says: “Formulated For Black Men To Help Stop Razor Bumps.”Here’s the low down on the down low. (Hee hee, get it?) I was talking with my sister the other day and I mentioned how I hate razor bumps. I have used a regular razor, AKA The Bump-O-Matic. I have used Nair, AKA The Burn-O-Matic. Plus I have been waxed, AKA The Holy-Mother-of-God-This-Hurts-Like-Hell-O-Matic. I am too cheap poor for laser removal, so that is out. And that weird mitt that I see on TV just really looks to me like sand paper. You aren’t fooling me, made for TV product guy! So, my older and wiser sister (Had to throw in that older part. Heh.) told me about this very inexpensive powder created for Black men and razor bumps. I know it’s intended for their beards but I Do What I Want. I’ve gotta say it smells something awful. Kind of like a perm. (Which on further thought should I be putting perm smelling paste down there? Oh well.) Needless to say it works wonderfully and at $2.50 it’s a steal! Hm. I wonder if they are hiring for PR work. I know some of you are going to run out and buy it. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.
What are you thankful for today?
I'm THANKFUL for your post and the SECRET GEM you have just shared with the world!!!! Where do I pick up some Soft Sheen – Magic Powder??? 🙂 (PS – I'm glad you shared your girl trouble with the world, so I don't have to – but I'm with you sister!)
I'm also thankful for this awesome weather – and awesome weather for my race this weekend.
Thanks for the tip! I am thankful for my family!!! Have a wonderful day.
Thanks for the tip! Also, after shaving, if you apply a LITTLE bit of baby oil to the area, it lessens the irritation. Or atleast, that's my personal experience.
Sweet! I can totally relate (dripping sarcasm). I'm now going to stab my brain.
lmao, thanks for sharing
TO THE MEN WHO READ DISCOMBOBULATED RUNNING: This post is to get your back for all your lame @ss Fantasy Football posts! *evil laugh*
As for the post itself, most hilarious trip to Publix ever! I think we giggled that entire visit…
I am thankful for ACE bandages… considering I have been living in them for the last 5 days.
LOL, I could have told you about that! I'm thankful that I've never had to use it in my shaving experience. Be careful, you know the old saying, 'Once you go Magic Shave, you'll never go………..'.
Good post… thanks for sharing the find! 🙂
Today I am thankful for… VITAMIN C! (Trying so hard not to get sick!)
LMAO at your post! I am thank for what Coach Ken said above and I think that might be made for Black Men that shave their heads? LOL
i want to make a gay joke about being a beard. but nothing is coming to the forefront.
all guys appreciate a smooth work surface. and THAT's TMI. hahahaha……..
Hmm…. You learn something new every day. I'm passing this on to both my sons. No – not the post, but the Razor Bump stuff. They both suffer from razor bumps on their necks. I know they've tried all kinds of different things to solve it. And guess if it works on your (ahem), then it's probably okay for their necks!
OMG, I can't stop laughing at the comments, Ken has me ROLLING!!!
I'm thankful I'm not over 75 so I could read this post….BWWAAhhhaAAAAAA
You are sooooo funny! I think I almost peed myself when I read the can!! Hey, if it works, more power to ya!! I just try not to put my big old butt in short shorts or bathing suits on a regular basis, bumps or no bumps! If I keep up all this running though, my butt and legs might look better in a suit next summer and then I am soooo headed to the store for the "magic powder"!!! Yeah baby!!!!
BTW the word "scogum" just came up – I am not even goin there! Haha!!
Do you think there's a "love handle" powder that would work well? I'm all over that!
You wonder where I get my material? It just writes itself.
FYI, does this relate at all?
I am thankful for "SMOOTH" skin…
I've totally been enlightened right now because of this. Oh the things I've learned from you.
I'm thankful for 6 days left till Birthday fun! 🙂
HOLY CRAP! Now that's funny. I must run out and purchase this magic powder you speak of. I hope you get some kind of kickback. Could you please test out Soul Glo next?? I'd love to know if it gives you that "O so silky smooth feeling".
Love reading your blog.I'm thankful for all the bloggers that keep it realz.
That's awesome. I love it. :o)
it must be magic, it comes in a can, its a powder, and it is less than $19.99.
I'm thankful for toast, it's delicious.
Ooh, I need me some of that stuff. I hate the bumps too!
Ok I am going to have to try it now! A cheap alternative to razor bumps I am all for!!
I am thankful for kleenex that have the lotion in the them due to fact I am using up a ton of them with this $#&* cold.
I am thankful for the laugh you gave me! lol you crack me up girl!
As a guy who shaves his head (easy…) I am sure this will com in handy one day.
hahaha. wow. i'm glad everything is going well in that department for you!
not so sure how all these guys would feel about their ladies … bits … having a perm smell either?
This is a PSA if I've ever seen one lady.
I've never seen this product before. On Tuesday I had a 3pm appointment with my super HOT gyn and around Noon I had a total panic attack when I realized I had not shaved…. so this information would have also been helpful on Tuesday! 🙂
Today I'm thankful for… everything. Feeling very blessed this week.
THAT IS HILARIOUS! I've actually heard about "Magic" and I've been super curious if it works…so thanks for being the unknowing guinea pig! Awesome!
Oh, and the Smooth Away works to an extent. It doesn't hurt at all, but it seriously just grinds your hair to a pulp. And it makes you smell like burnt hair. Yuck. I guess sticking to the "Magic" and a razor works better. 🙂
OMG, I am a day late, but this is too funny! You are superb at blogging. I am thinking you should try stand-up comedy.
I am thankful for weekends, as one is right around the corner, and I really need some rest!!!
LOL! Oh your post made my morning! I'm still laughing. I also like to be trim, but not brazilian, so I will have to check this stuff out.
Thanks for sharing. Now I can justify sharing how I use vasoline up near my down low before races. Got to love TMI!
This is the funniest post!! I am actually thankful that I am a little late posting because I, too, enjoy a slick down low and have learned lots of stuff from you as well as your commenters! All in all… very educational! haha!
I am all over it…thanks!!!
Hilarious. I love reading your blog.
Also, coochee cream is awesome if you want something a little more girly. Sold by Athena's. And it even doubles a hair conditioner. Bonus! haha
I'm thankful I was smart enough to get roadside assistance when I switched our car insurance a few months ago. Otherwise I would have been trying to change a flat tire with a flat spare this week!
I am thankful for this blog! Where are my car keys!?!?!?!?!!!
Leave it to you to disappoint pre-teen boys in the region…
HA, this is priceless! Thanks for the tip, girl–I'd never heard of the stuff before . . .
What does "Depilatory" mean?